


Rubber Duckie

by Goodbyemyfancy



Category: Jumper (2008)
Genre: First Kiss, M/M, accidental kitchen accident
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-04
Updated: 2014-02-04
Packaged: 2018-01-11 04:07:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1168472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Goodbyemyfancy/pseuds/Goodbyemyfancy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Griffin explores David's new home and falls in love with the bathroom. Kitchen mishaps entailing nakedness and burning coffee ensues.  Comedy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rubber Duckie

The first time David brought him back to see the new apartment, it was evident that Griffin was feeling incredibly awkward, but it doesn’t stop the smaller jumper from waltzing in the front door acting as if he had been there a dozen times before and was lord and master. Griffin stopped, hands on his hips, and slowly surveyed the room.

He turned back to where David was standing behind him and snarked over his shoulder, “Pretty swanky abode you have here. So much stuff. So many high–end brand names.” The last bit came out with a bit of a sneer and David jerked his head back, feeling foolish yet again. Somehow, Griffin could take any event or situation and just rip it down instantly. David said back stiffly, trying to ignore what the other jumper had just said, “Here. Let me show you around.”

And of course, he had to put up with a non-stop litany of pointed comments from Griffin about everything in David’s apartment. The colours, the décor, the excess of materialism. Griffin only liked three things.

First, David’s espresso machine. Griffin’s blue eyes went huge when he saw it, and he demanded instantly, “Since I’m the guest here, you should make me a coffee. No, make that a double espresso. And right now would be perfect.” David wound up staying in the kitchen making up espressos for them while the other jumper wandered around on his own, checking everything out in David’s new place.

The second thing Griffin appreciated, though he didn’t reveal this to David, was his library collection. For Griffin, having spent his whole life self-educated, the vast wealth of information available in David’s apartment made him feel totally envious and jealous of David’s life. After all, his book collection was small and the books themselves all beaten up, broken-spined, and covered in dirt and stains. The American had one entire wall of his new living room dedicated to his bookshelves. He had obviously spent a ton of money buying books after Roland had tracked him to his previous apartment and destroyed it.

While waiting for his coffee, Griffin continued meandering around the place, looking everywhere, touching everything. David watched amused from the kitchen as Griffin, like a cat in a new place leaving territorial markers on every object in sight, felt confident enough to pop his nose into any that caught his attention. Flipping open books, touching random items, opening closets and rummaging through drawers and moving things around, even settling down for a few minutes to test out David’s new computer; it was like Griffin needed to personally alter David’s space to make room for him to exist.

But the third thing … well, he was introduced to that after David handed him his espresso (which, of course, was the best he had ever tasted in his life and made him annoyed at David) and took him around the upper level of the apartment. Taking a sip, just as he entered the master bathroom, Griffin wound up coughing and inhaling the still scalding coffee and burning his throat. He was pissed he made himself look like an idiot from his rather obvious reaction to David’s bathroom. It was truly a spectacular room designed for maximum pleasure, and it made Griffin’s solar-warmed outdoor shower seem incredibly antiquated. A massive claw-foot tub that looked like it could fit a few people, an enclosed shower with jets that sprayed in all directions, and a toilet that looked like something from a science fiction movie. Griffin couldn’t even figure out what most of the toilet options were supposed to do.

What really made him laugh was the sheer volume of bathing supplies David had stored in the bathroom closet. Bath and shower gets from all over the world, designer shampoos and conditioners and weekly deep conditioners and stay in conditioners. Soaps of all colours and smells and sized and shapes. Lotions galore – scented, unscented, for delicate skin and normal and dry and oily; even those for the body, and for the face. Shaving gels offering a variety of ways to safely get the closest shave. Hell, there must have been at least 20 different colognes and after-shaves alone. And a stack of big fluffy clean towels in a variety of colours that were so inviting Griffin decided he needed to take immediately advantage of David once again.

“Right then,” he said, shoving the now empty espresso cup into David’s startled hands. “I’m just going to clean myself up and if you’re a really good host, you’d be making me another espresso while I’m busy. Actually, can you make it a cappuccino this time?” David looked astonished as Griffin gleefully started stripping right there on the spot, leather jacket dropped to the floor, his t-shirt flung into the dirty clothes hamper. When Griffin reached to unbutton his jeans, David blushed and backed quickly out of the room, calling out as he fled, “Um, just help yourself to whatever’s around, there’s lots of stuff, I’ll have the coffee ready when you’re finished.”

By the time Griffin was done having a bubble bath in addition to a long shower, the cappuccino was probably cold. Very cold, in fact. Griffin decided to try out every single bathing relating product he could find, and spent more than an hour in this wondrous magical bathroom treating himself. He soaked in the massive tub, bubbles everywhere, sunk down to his nose and enjoying the delicious sensation of all of his pains and aches and stress melting away. He piled bubbles on his head, making funny fake hairstyles and imaginary hats, and laughed in delight.

And investigating the covered wooden basket tucked next to the bathtub, he found what appeared to be an entire collection of rubber duckies of every type imaginable from around the world. Griffin snickered, knowing he now had ammunition to tease David about that would last him months, then dumped the entire bucket of ducks in with him gleefully. This was easily the most fun he had had in a long time, not to mention the cleanest he had been in what felt like years. He stayed in there until the bathwater had cooled considerably, sucking every last drop of pleasure from the experience. Somehow, jumping through lakes and oceans and rivers never left him feeling fresh and unsoiled. And his shower at the lair left much to be desired.

After reluctantly draining the tub and rinsing it out properly, and drying out all the duckies, Griffin made a bee-line for the large enclosed shower. The jets came on from all directions, the water pre-set to the perfect temperature, and Griffin was even more in heaven. He shampooed his hair with 6 different types of shampoo, and then added some deep conditioner with a crisp citrus smell while he stood there and scrubbed his skin all over with a nice loofah sponge. By the time he was done, his skin felt scoured clean, years of grime finally removed, and his skin felt tingly and soft. He even trimmed his broken nails and took a callous remover to his heels, scraping off layers upon layers of dead skin. He grinned, knowing how much this would probably gross out David.

After finally rinsing the deep conditioner out of his now very clean and fluffy hair, Griffin dried himself off and wondered what he could try next. Seeing David’s fancy Mach razor, Griffin decided to take advantage and give himself a really good shave. After months of living in a dirty cave and not bothering to take care of his appearance, this was simply too good an opportunity. He carefully checked out all the shaving options in the closet, and elected for a nice pine-forest smelling foaming gel. Standing naked in front of the huge bathroom mirror, he watched in amazement as the razor scrapped off weeks of dark stubble, leaving behind perfectly smooth polished skin. He rinsed his face, and then added some after-shave whose sandalwood scent appealed to him, finally ending the experience by using at least 5 different lotions on his face and body.

Finished at last, Griffin took a long look at himself, standing naked in the mirror. His skin was clean and soft and sweet smelling, his hair looked normal and not like a rat’s nest, and he didn’t feel the constant aches that had been his companions for so many years. The bare skin on his face looked and felt the most strange, but when it came down to it, Griffin realized he cleaned up quite well and could look somewhat attractive if he really wanted to put in the time and energy. For all David was a fussy, prissy, self-oriented git, he really knew his shit when it came to pampering himself.

Griffin looked regretfully at the disgusting rags he had been wearing, and opening the door, bellowed out into the apartment, “Yo! You have anything clean I can wear until I can do my laundry?” David shouted back, “Walk across the hall, you lazy Brit. I’ve laid out some clothes for you already.” Griffin sniggered to himself, enjoying that David had actually expected this demand and already seen to it.

Wrapping a fluffy towel around his waist, Griffin instead padded downstairs to kitchen to grab his coffee first. David had his back to Griffin, who enjoyed startling the taller man by suddenly saying, “I never figured you for being a total metrosexual, though it now seems quite obvious.” The taller jumper whipped around, startled, and noticing Griffin was only wearing a towel, surprised the smaller jumper by turning fifteen shades of red and half-dropped the cappuccino he held in his hand. Griffin leaped forward to catch the mug before it fell, and his big fluffy towel nearly fell off.

The ensuring chaos could have been turned into a legend of epic comedy proportions. David managed to save the mug, until Griffin stumbled against him in his effort to keep his towel on, resulting in David spilling the coffee all over himself. The resulting scream of pain let Griffin know the cappuccinos were still incredibly hot, but he didn’t really notice because by now his towel was hanging off, held on by one hand, barely covering his genitals. Not that he minded, personally, since he liked wandering around unclothed in his lair, but given David’s initial blushing attack, he figured David might be more sensitive to a naked guy in his kitchen.

Then David slipped on the wet spill underfoot and lost his balance, and since Griffin was holding onto David for support with his other hand, the two went crashing down in a wild mess of arms and legs and more shrieks of pain from them both. David was rolling around ripping and tearing his wet shirt off trying to check his burned skin, while Griffin was naked and using his now dirty towel to mop up the mess on the floor and clean up the broken bits of the coffee mug.

The kicker was when the sole remaining mug of coffee, left sitting to close to the edge of the counter, was accidentally bumped by David as he attempted to stand up to see how badly he was scalded, and came crossing down on them both. This time, the coffee hit the upper part of David’s thighs, and splashed across Griffin’s naked ass as he leaned down to pick up the last shard of pottery. Their matching bellows of agony could probably have been heard from blocks away.

Griffin bolted like a runaway horse around one side of the center island, still jaybird naked and aiming for safety, only to run headfirst into David who had shot around the other side with the same game plan. The resulting head smash nearly knocked them both out, and for about ten minutes both jumpers just flung themselves around in blinding pain, seeing stars and comets and unable to stand upright.

Finally, the waves of pounding pain receding and laying sprawled out together on the floor, Griffin looked sideways at David, and with a smirky grin, commented, “You know, you’re not a very good host. And you are a bit of a clutz, to say the least. Though you do make a great espresso.” David was ready to punch him, but deciding he had no energy to move, simply instead raised his head wearily to assess the damage. Seeing Griffin naked, the carnage that had ruined his nice clean kitchen, and his own scald marks on his chest and most likely across his thighs, David realized that the situation was actually more hilarious than it was annoying. It sure as hell beat any comedy routine by the Three Stooges or Charlie Chaplin. It was pure slapstick and it was so much like them to have something like this happen. He just wished it hadn’t been so extremely painful.

And much to Griffin’s great surprise, David began laughing like mad, a side-splitting kind of laughter that just kept building every time he looked around the kitchen or at Griffin. Griffin was startled, expecting to be shouted at, then realized the absurdity of how they both looked and what condition they were in, and joined in. They laughed themselves sick, the gut-busting kind that would taper off, only to be triggered once again as they found something else that caught their eye and then they were off again. Maybe it was because they had concussions, or simply because the whole thing had gotten incredibly out of control, but they would up holding each other, tears streaming down their faces, lying there together amidst the chaos.

Eventually they managed to get themselves back under control, only to realize that two things. Firstly, they were totally wrapped around one another, Griffin partially sprawled across David’s bare and scalded chest; and secondly, they both seemed to be sporting rather noticeable erections. Well, Griffin more so because he was naked and his cock was poking hard into David’s thigh, but David’s now coffee-soaked pants were tented and a blush was rising on his cheeks.

The two stopped giggling immediately, neither sure how to deal with the situation presently at hand. David finally smiled at Griffin, their faces scarcely inches apart, and quipped, “You know, you’re not the ideal guest to have over either.” And then with a raised eyebrow, added quickly, “Most people usually keep their clothes on until later on their date.” Griffin was massively amused, and replied, “Well, I’m not most people now, am I? And I’m wondering when this became a date for us?” David pulled Griffin further against him, and whispered in Griffin’s ear, “I think most people would take the presence of a towel-clad friend popping into the kitchen as something more that a chat over coffee. And I thought you were going to get dressed first before you headed down.”

Griffin suddenly remembered how deeply David had blushed, and nearly dropped the hot cappuccino, starting the whole chain of events. He thought of dozens of retorts, each more hilariously nasty than the previous, and then decided enough was enough. He grabbed David, one hand firmly planted on each side of his face, and making sure not to smash their heads, placed a deep passionate kiss on David. It was hard and a bit rough, and their teeth smashed together for a second before Griffin’s tongue invaded David’s waiting mouth.

Griffin’s kisses were demanding and possessive; it was Griffin who kept control from the first, commanding the situation. He was leaning over, sucking on David’s luscious lips, and plunging his tongue into the taller jumper’s spacious mouth over and over again. David clearly didn’t mind, because he opened his lips and started to devour Griffin’s mouth in return, biting into the dried and gnawed skin from where Griffin always unconsciously worried his lower lip. David was clutching onto him like he never wanted to let go, and the fingers digging into Griffin’s naked flesh keep pulling them even closer together on the floor.

This became Griffin’s fourth favorite thing about David’s new apartment – David. He wasn’t sure if kissing David counted as the fifth or the fourth, but at this point he stopped taking an inventory of the apartment. David’s mouth was warm and wet and inviting, and damn but he knew how to make kissing feeling like pure raw sex. Their kisses were hungry and filled with desire and regardless of how it started it was clear they were both committed to this change in their friendship.

And they kept making out, ignoring the messy disaster in the kitchen, until David instinctively reached down to palm Griffin’s naked ass, only to have the smaller jumper shove David away and start hollering, scratching David’s chest with his newly trimmed nails as he pushed off, resulting in a matching shriek from the taller jumper.

When they finally stopped screaming in pain, both noticed the red burn marks that covered part of David’s chest matching the bright burns that stretched down the side of Griffin’s left butt cheek. And then both jumpers remembered that the cappuccinos had been freshly brewed and piping hot when they were both splashed. Both looked down to see the coffee-soaked splatter across the upper part of David’s pants. Griffin snickered, commenting with teasing tone, “I bet that really smarts. If it had been much higher, you might have lost some important bits down there.” David slugged him lightly on the bicep and carefully reached to pull Griffin’s unclad body towards him, throwing an arm across his smaller friend’s shoulders. “Yeah, well, you’d have regretted it, believe me,” David quipped and kissed Griffin first this time, a gentle swiping of lip across lip and a tender probing of his tongue into Griffin’s mouth. This time, they kept it calm and conscious of their injuries.

Griffin was the one to finally pull back, with a sigh of complaint at having to end their kiss, “Sorry to cut things short, but out of curiosity, do you have any burn cream around? I’m really starting to hurt now, and I bet you’re the same. Given the rest of this joint, I expect you might have a hospital hidden in some spare room.” David laughed, joking back, ‘Well, since the nurses and doctors have left for the day, I think we might want to try out my first-aid box in the bathroom. Griffin grinned and added saucily, “We both might need all-over physical exams, you know. After all, we both got a bit scalded by the kitchen fiasco. I think a proper check-up is in order.”

He would have kept blathering, but David grabbed Griffin immediately and kissed him thoroughly until the Brit jumper finally shut up, then managed to pull the both of them up onto their feet, using the counter edge carefully for support, and dragged them off to the upstairs bathroom. “OK, check-ups it is then.” David murmured as he began cleaning at the red and slightly blistered skin, delicately smoothing on the burn cream across Griffin’s scalded butt cheek, “But only if I get to play doctor first.”

**Author's Note:**

> Griffin and David belong to Steven Gould and 20th Century Fox. I just play with them and return them only slightly bruised.


End file.
